Being Indian is at the forefront of my personality; it comes up regularly in conversations I have with friends, families, or mere acquaintances. But recent incidents, such as the now-notorious New Delhi gang rape, have sparked conversations about India that are much more than the usual chit-chat about the spicy food, bright saris, or the popular Bollywood movie industry.

I’ve heard numerous comments along the lines of “the culture in India needs to change; rape shouldn’t be acceptable over there” or “the biggest problem in India is the rape culture.”

These comments are incredibly frustrating– India is in no way more tolerant of rape than any other country.

We can’t take little anecdotes and use them to portray a country as backwards and uncivilized; it’s condescending and harkens back to the perceived moral superiority that has failed America in the past.

When the Newtown shootings happened, countries around the world used it to portray the United States as violent and barbaric. As a country, we were angered by these statements and argued that one incident should not be used to tarnish the reputation of a country as a whole.

These claims that we are tolerant of violence seem almost laughable to most citizens. How can a country ever be tolerant of something so horrible as gun violence? Of course that’s not true. It’s true that gun violence, like any other horrible crime, occurs here. But we are in no way tolerant of it.

But wait. We have done the exact same thing to India and many other countries around the world. We can’t act like we’re on a moral high ground in this situation; rape is a worldwide problem and not specifically related to Indian culture. It is especially troubling to me that after the strong response many Indians had to this issue (the whole city of New Delhi was shutdown due to protests) we still find ways to blame it on the culture.

Granted, there are people in India who don’t think of rape as a serious issue. However, this is not related to them being of Indian origin. We have plenty of people in the United States who don’t think of rape as a serious issue as well.

If we really want to take a step in solving the issue of violence against women around the world, we need to stop acting so patronizing.

No country is going to be receptive to a condescending attitude from another country. News of a violent event in another country should not be a label. All countries have crime; it’s time we stop deluding ourselves that we have the moral high ground.